500 Million Faces and Counting...
"Don't put this on Facebook."
I swear I heard this phrase uttered at least fifteen times the other day, if not more. It didn't seem to matter where I was. In the store, at the beach, at a party. Anywhere cameras exist. It has become the battle cry of nearly 500 million people worldwide.
"Don't put this on Facebook."
Ok, I admit to using this phrase occasionally myself. And yes, I still waste time on the social networking giant, though not nearly as much as I once did. I mean, I was a hardcore addict at first. It was nothing to waste six, seven, eight hours (or more) on Facebook each day. Facebooking was the verb I used to describe my new hobby, and also to detail what I was doing with half of my day. I think I could have led a Facebookers Anonymous meeting at one point. It probably would have gone something like this:
"Hi, my name is Paul, and I changed my status three times today. I instant-messaged four of my friends, all at once, and poked three people. I can't stop looking at pictures of people I barely know, involved in situations I know nothing about. I have a problem. "
The funny thing was, I couldn't tell you what I was doing on there for all those hours. I guess mostly, I was just being a voyeur. Looking around at all the illusions being created. Creating some of my own. Taking quizzes (remember those? I kinda miss them, actually). Spending time (re-)connecting with Facebook like it was an old friend that knew me oh so well. Having my "old friend" tell me important information, such as which Golden Girl I would be (Blanche...duh!). Or which era I most resonate with (hello, 70s!). Besides the fact that I had literally gotten back in touch with so many old friends, Facebook itself was like one of them, and also became my new best friend at the same time.
In the three years of my Facebook membership, my addiction has run the gamet. First was the giddy phase, when I was busy re-establishing connections with everyone, proclaiming how wonderful and simple it was to keep in touch, and then snapping photos of myself in front of every possible background hoping for that great new profile picture. Every moment became a potentially great Facebook moment. It was like my own reality show!
Next came the leveling off phase, when the daily friend requests stopped and I began to really realize how much time I was frittering away on the thing. I still loved it, mind you. I was only just beginning to realize the depths of my addiction. I would continue to stay up way too late each night, checking my news feed and also....yep....looking at pictures. Uh-huh. Of more people I didn't really know. Uh, yes. Guilty as charged. I was still fascinated, but starting to become a bit shocked at my behavior. And probably, even more shocked at how hard it was to stop it.
The next phase was the hardest. I guess it was sort of like the breakup phase. I would get a little sick reading people's posts (including my own), and see how incredibly inane all of it really was. I did not care anymore that anyone took a big dump, had a glass of wine, or did both at the same time. Spare me the details. So I told myself I would not post any status updates anymore. No more illusions to create, I was done. That lasted about two months. I still posted pictures, mind you. (I couldn't go cold turkey, after all!) And yes, I could have stopped going on Facebook completely. That was always an option. Oh well. I guess I wasn't that strong. Or maybe the addiction was stronger.
Where do I stand now? Well, I would say I am on level ground with it. I have accepted most of the good and evil doings of my former old/new best friend. I still find it to be a terrific, compact way to keep in touch with everyone. I admit it can still be alot of fun to share in everyone's Facebook moments. And yes, I still have an occasional "can't look away from the train wreck" feeling every so often, when I spend more time than I care to admit perusing through my friends' stuff like a peeping tom who can't put down the telescope. But those times are infrequent now, and I am ok with them when they happen. I guess I have accepted Facebook's place in my life, in our lives.
But one fact remains inescapable for me. At the end of the day, it is all just an illusion. With Facebook, it is like Halloween every day. We can dress up as anything we want, at any time, and even post some pictures to prove it. I have personally been the traveler, the candy-eater, the drunk, the inspirer, and the bitter employee--sometimes all in the same week. Most of it is harmless, but why do I even feel the need to create such illusions to begin with?
This leads me to the battle cry I mentioned earlier. "Don't put this on Facebook." Whenever I hear this, I am reminded of just how hard we all struggle to establish an identity in this world. Maybe even more, I question why it is necessary to have one (or many) in the first place. Between social networking and so-called reality shows, the hobby of the moment appears to be throwing illusions/identities in the air like a juggler tossing up fragile china plates. Eventually, one or all of these plates will crash to the floor and smash into a million pieces. We work so hard to create so many different illusions. In this age of techonology, when something doesn't fit the illusion we want to create, we can delete it. Or defriend it. Or just remember to tell everyone not to put it on Facebook.
But is that really the end of it? Hardly. Maybe the greater good behind Facebook is to help alert us to when we cannot keep up with who we think we are anymore. We cannot, no matter how hard we try, escape our own trash, our own faults, or our own desire to hide from ourselves and everyone else in the process. But there comes a time to take a break and reel it in a little bit. Step away from the computer. Put down the I-phone. Not for good, of course, but for long enough to see what is really going on. Everything has its place. Balance is key, especially when the number of plates being juggled starts getting out of control. And it seems like nobody is exempt from this. Not being a member of Facebook just means that your juggling act has a slightly lower profile.
I think it is important to remember, as often as possible, that we are actually not who we think we are. We are way more than that. Certainly (dare I say it) even more than we could ever post in a single status update on Facebook, Twitter, or any other social media du jour.
Now, if you will excuse me, I am going to post this on....where else? Yep. Facebook. Like I said, nobody is exempt.
Gotta keep those plates spinning.
I swear I heard this phrase uttered at least fifteen times the other day, if not more. It didn't seem to matter where I was. In the store, at the beach, at a party. Anywhere cameras exist. It has become the battle cry of nearly 500 million people worldwide.
"Don't put this on Facebook."
Ok, I admit to using this phrase occasionally myself. And yes, I still waste time on the social networking giant, though not nearly as much as I once did. I mean, I was a hardcore addict at first. It was nothing to waste six, seven, eight hours (or more) on Facebook each day. Facebooking was the verb I used to describe my new hobby, and also to detail what I was doing with half of my day. I think I could have led a Facebookers Anonymous meeting at one point. It probably would have gone something like this:
"Hi, my name is Paul, and I changed my status three times today. I instant-messaged four of my friends, all at once, and poked three people. I can't stop looking at pictures of people I barely know, involved in situations I know nothing about. I have a problem. "
The funny thing was, I couldn't tell you what I was doing on there for all those hours. I guess mostly, I was just being a voyeur. Looking around at all the illusions being created. Creating some of my own. Taking quizzes (remember those? I kinda miss them, actually). Spending time (re-)connecting with Facebook like it was an old friend that knew me oh so well. Having my "old friend" tell me important information, such as which Golden Girl I would be (Blanche...duh!). Or which era I most resonate with (hello, 70s!). Besides the fact that I had literally gotten back in touch with so many old friends, Facebook itself was like one of them, and also became my new best friend at the same time.
In the three years of my Facebook membership, my addiction has run the gamet. First was the giddy phase, when I was busy re-establishing connections with everyone, proclaiming how wonderful and simple it was to keep in touch, and then snapping photos of myself in front of every possible background hoping for that great new profile picture. Every moment became a potentially great Facebook moment. It was like my own reality show!
Next came the leveling off phase, when the daily friend requests stopped and I began to really realize how much time I was frittering away on the thing. I still loved it, mind you. I was only just beginning to realize the depths of my addiction. I would continue to stay up way too late each night, checking my news feed and also....yep....looking at pictures. Uh-huh. Of more people I didn't really know. Uh, yes. Guilty as charged. I was still fascinated, but starting to become a bit shocked at my behavior. And probably, even more shocked at how hard it was to stop it.
The next phase was the hardest. I guess it was sort of like the breakup phase. I would get a little sick reading people's posts (including my own), and see how incredibly inane all of it really was. I did not care anymore that anyone took a big dump, had a glass of wine, or did both at the same time. Spare me the details. So I told myself I would not post any status updates anymore. No more illusions to create, I was done. That lasted about two months. I still posted pictures, mind you. (I couldn't go cold turkey, after all!) And yes, I could have stopped going on Facebook completely. That was always an option. Oh well. I guess I wasn't that strong. Or maybe the addiction was stronger.
Where do I stand now? Well, I would say I am on level ground with it. I have accepted most of the good and evil doings of my former old/new best friend. I still find it to be a terrific, compact way to keep in touch with everyone. I admit it can still be alot of fun to share in everyone's Facebook moments. And yes, I still have an occasional "can't look away from the train wreck" feeling every so often, when I spend more time than I care to admit perusing through my friends' stuff like a peeping tom who can't put down the telescope. But those times are infrequent now, and I am ok with them when they happen. I guess I have accepted Facebook's place in my life, in our lives.
But one fact remains inescapable for me. At the end of the day, it is all just an illusion. With Facebook, it is like Halloween every day. We can dress up as anything we want, at any time, and even post some pictures to prove it. I have personally been the traveler, the candy-eater, the drunk, the inspirer, and the bitter employee--sometimes all in the same week. Most of it is harmless, but why do I even feel the need to create such illusions to begin with?
This leads me to the battle cry I mentioned earlier. "Don't put this on Facebook." Whenever I hear this, I am reminded of just how hard we all struggle to establish an identity in this world. Maybe even more, I question why it is necessary to have one (or many) in the first place. Between social networking and so-called reality shows, the hobby of the moment appears to be throwing illusions/identities in the air like a juggler tossing up fragile china plates. Eventually, one or all of these plates will crash to the floor and smash into a million pieces. We work so hard to create so many different illusions. In this age of techonology, when something doesn't fit the illusion we want to create, we can delete it. Or defriend it. Or just remember to tell everyone not to put it on Facebook.
But is that really the end of it? Hardly. Maybe the greater good behind Facebook is to help alert us to when we cannot keep up with who we think we are anymore. We cannot, no matter how hard we try, escape our own trash, our own faults, or our own desire to hide from ourselves and everyone else in the process. But there comes a time to take a break and reel it in a little bit. Step away from the computer. Put down the I-phone. Not for good, of course, but for long enough to see what is really going on. Everything has its place. Balance is key, especially when the number of plates being juggled starts getting out of control. And it seems like nobody is exempt from this. Not being a member of Facebook just means that your juggling act has a slightly lower profile.
I think it is important to remember, as often as possible, that we are actually not who we think we are. We are way more than that. Certainly (dare I say it) even more than we could ever post in a single status update on Facebook, Twitter, or any other social media du jour.
Now, if you will excuse me, I am going to post this on....where else? Yep. Facebook. Like I said, nobody is exempt.
Gotta keep those plates spinning.
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